the magician

Sexy Tarot: The Magician

With a little help from my evil twin Veronica, this blog series aims to answer the two burning questions that are probably on every Tarot enthusiasts mind:
1) If this Tarot card were a person, what would they be like in bed?
2) What advice does this card have for you about your sex life?

The Magician

Cosmic Tarot

There’s no beating around the bush here – The Magician is a master seducer of epic proportions!

If The Magician ever crosses your path, hold onto your hat (and your panties!) because you have no idea what you’re in for!

The Don Juan of the Tarot, The Magician almost always succeeds in his seduction because he knows how to captivate you on all four levels of your being – body, mind, emotion and spirit – which most sleazy pick up artists overlook.

This is what gives The Magician his power and edge in the bedroom. Sure, he’s got all the confusing sex techniques down pat but he also knows how to get inside your head and fuck your thoughts – hard! He can manipulate your feelings and spiritual energy until the powerful currents of eroticism overtake you – body and soul. Sound dramatic? It is!

But here’s the catch: while The Magician loves the process of seduction he is utterly bored by the end result – you. He’s not interested in a relationship because those are tedious and hard. He’s just in it for the thrill of the chase!

On some level this guy has low self esteem and each successful seduction gives him a temporary spike in self worth. But it doesn’t last and so off he goes again, penis in hand…

Manipulative and sleazy tactics aside, The Magician has some pretty solid advice for you. He says “if the sex you’ve been having is dull, remember to incorporate all aspects of your being – body, mind, emotion and spirit – into the act. Sex without feeling and spiritual connection is just bits going into bits…and stuff.”

Don’t emulate The Magician, because God only knows this dude’s got issues. But emulate his holistic approach to sexy times – you won’t regret it!

The Magician even recommends some his favorite sex and seduction books (for your reading pleasure):

The Game by Neil Strauss
Sacred Sexuality by Michael Mirdad
(note: these are my Amazon affiliate links – if you buy any of these sexy books, I get a few cents)

Tune in next week when I dare to enter the raunchy realms of The High Priestess!

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How to get everything you’ve ever wanted

Veronica is my nefarious Tarot reading twin. At night she slinks through the streets under the cover of darkness, hunting for young, unsuspecting man-meat. By daylight she naps, writes filth and eats bon bons. But on Fridays, she reads Tarot – for you, right here…

Cosmic Tarot

Have you noticed that the more out of reach something is, the more attractive it becomes?

Married men, luxury yachts and some fucking peace and quiet are all good examples.

But have you also noticed that when you stop wanting something, that’s when you finally get it?

The only jobs I’ve ever gotten were jobs I never really wanted. Come to think of it, I’ve never really wanted a job – ever.

When you don’t need or want something, you keep your power. And that power emanates from you like a sexy glow, attracting moths, lovers, jobs and all sorts of shit.

So stop wanting. Stop being so god damn needy all the time! Stop drooling over pricey shoes and underage pizza delivery boys. Geez!

When you don’t want or need anything, no one can control you. You can’t be tempted, seduced or manipulated. You are your own person. A maverick. A trailblazer. Strutting to your own slutty beat. Or maybe that’s just me?

In any case, I absolutely DO NOT WANT to live in a seaside castle with 100 cats and kittens, eating vanilla-lemon cupcakes all day and watching ASMR videos on the youtubes. Not at all 😉

What about you? What do you absolutely NOT want in your life?

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