Tarot in the Kitchen

The Empress in the Kitchen….the laziest cook ever!


Blending food and Tarot, this blog series takes a look at each Major Arcana and asks the question โ€œwhat would this card be like in the kitchen and what food would they make?โ€
The usual Friday’s with Veronica posts will return in October.

Crystal Visions Tarot

The Empress is one laid back lady. She doesn’t fret or fuss, she just lets things unfold as they may while she sits back and enjoys the show.

In the kitchen, she’s low effort all the way. She enjoys the fruit of her fertile garden and prefers raw veggie snacks not because shes a raw foodist but so she doesn’t have to piss around cooking things.

The simpler, the better!

But make no mistake, The Empress isn’t into scrounging or lite snacking. Nourishment is important to her and so everything she makes is deeply satisfying.

Fresh fruit fanned out beautifully, carrots, snap peas, kale, radishes and cucumber, served with a tahini rich hummus and green olives. This is a divine snack that should be enjoyed regularly.

Veggies and Hummus (Empress style)

So I know this sounds boring, but trust me, it’s more lavish than it sounds….

1 can cannellini or butter beans (or any kind of soft, white bean)
splash or two of olive oil1/2 lemon, juiced
1 heaping Tbsp tahini
1/2 tsp sea salt
1 clove garlic, crushed

Serve with carrot sticks, cucumber rounds, green olives, rice crackers, tomatoes and kale or collard leaves. You can dob some on a big kale leaf then fill with olives and cherry tomatoes and roll up to eat it. Fun stuff!


Tarot in the Kitchen: Fermenting with the High Priestess


Blending food and Tarot, this blog series takes a look at each Major Arcana and asks the question โ€œwhat would this card be like in the kitchen and what food would they make?โ€

mystic meg tarot
Mystic Meg Tarot

The High Priestess is mysterious, powerful and wise. In the kitchen she gravitates toward making things that not just any joe schmo could make.

Like fermented foods!

Fermentation has a fascinating, internal process – also known as rotting – that transforms ordinary food like cabbage into complex and sophisticated condiments like sauerkraut and kimchi.

Intuition, dreams, the unconscious – these are the realms of the High Priestess and she guides you on making this trip down into your underworld, to meet with your inner knowing.

And just as the human psyche has much bubbling and brewing underneath it, fermentation is a process during which food just appears to sit there and do nothing, yet wild microbes and bacteria are doing all kinds of crazy shit!

Can’t you just imagine the High Priestess’s kitchen? It would be filled with bottles of herbal tinctures and jars of fermenting foods – secret recipes that have been passed down through the generations.

So here is my absolute favorite fermented foods recipe:

Fermented Lemons!

5-7 organic lemons
2.5 Tbsp sea salt (either coarse or fine – but if you use fine, you can use a bit less)

1. Halve 5 lemons and juice them, pouring juice in a medium sized mason jar or large sized jam jar. Add 1 Tbsp of salt to lemon juice and stir to dissolve.

2. Cut each lemon halve into four pieces. Place some of the lemon bits into the jar and add some more salt, then add more pieces and more salt until all the lemon bits are in the jar and there’s no salt left. Place a heavy rock or paper weight in the jar to press the lemons below the liquid. If there isn’t enough liquid to do this, juice the other two lemons and add that.

3. loosely screw the lid on – you don’t want it airtight though! Sit it on your counter and let it ferment for about 3-4 weeks. Mold may grow on the top, but don’t get all squeamish – just skim it off and get on with life.

4. After 3 or 4 weeks, taste a bit of lemon. It should taste like lemon preserves but without the sweetness. Like candied lemons that are salty instead of sweet. If they still taste more like raw lemons and not magical enough, let them sit a few more days. But if they are satisfactory to you, transfer them to the fridge where they will probably keep for a very long time.

But what the f*ck am I going to do with fermented lemons? I hear you whine. Put them in tabbouleh salads, pasta salads, moroccan Tagines or even tomato-based pasta sauces and soups! I sometimes put a bit of fermented lemon on goat cheese and crackers or skewer a bit of lemon along with a green olive and dunk it in my kombucha or Ceasar. The sky’s the limit!

Oh, and if you have sugar cravings, just a bit of fermented lemon will kill it. You’re welcome ๐Ÿ˜‰

Tarot in the Kitchen: The Magician

TarotBlending food and Tarot, this blog series takes a look at each Major Arcana and asks the question “what would this card be like in the kitchen and what food would they make?”

Cosmic Tarot
Cosmic Tarot

The Magician is part trickster, part seducer, part alchemist and nothing is more magical and seductive than delicious baking! Well, unless your gluten intolerant.

The fact that you can put a bunch of gross, globby dough or batter in a pan and then have the oven transform it into some puffy, buttery goodness is a thrilling concept.

All good cooks are magicians. And all good cookbooks are like magic books with spell-like recipes inside!

I have this one cookbook, called Let Them Eat Vegan and some of the recipes look like they would be super crappy – for example, walnuts, almond milk, rice pasta and broccoli were the main ingredients in the casserole I made last night. But guess what? That recipe turned out to be awesome! True alchemy!

So in the kitchen, The Magician chops, kneads and whisks with sexy confidence and mischievous charm. The sword is his knife, the wand his stir stick, the cup is his measuring cup and the pentacle is like a cookie cutter….or maybe one of those weird things people put in sugar jars to stop it clumping.

What does the Magician love to make? Mmmmmuffins! And here is a recipe that I’ve adapted from my Best of Bridge cookbook and have been making for years. Everyone is always really impressed when I make these and then I kind of feel guilty because they are so easy:

Magic Muffins

1 orange
1/2 cup orange juice
1 egg
1/4 cup oil (I like grapeseed)
1.5 cups whole spelt flour (but you could just use crappy white flour if you wanted to)
1/4 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
handful of dried fruit of choice, chopped into bits (I like dried apricots or cherries)
1/2 cup chopped walnuts

1. cut orange into 8 bits and blend in blender with orange juice, egg and oil until its smooth.

2. Add all other ingredients except dried fruit and nuts. Blend.

3. Now, add fruit and nuts and blend only a little – until it’s mixed.

4. Pour dough into a lined muffin tin (makes 12 muffins) and bake at 375F for 15-20 minutes.

Tarot in the Kitchen: The Fool


If you’re wondering where the hell is Veronica? don’t worry – she’s on vacation for the entire month of September, sipping chocolate martinis and slapping man butts in some exotic locale. She will return in October, the month of black cats, falling leaves and slutty costumes.

For September I bring you a new series of blog posts in an attempt to meld my two loves – food and Tarot! I just finished a one year program to become a Holistic Nutritionist and I’ve been itching to work my way through the Major Arcana, putting a culinary twist on each card….

The Fool

the fool
Fairytale Tarot by Karen Mahony

In the kitchen, The Fool is bold, daring and free. He doesn’t bother with recipes, preferring to freestyle it instead.

The Fool is about trust – trusting that your recipe will work out, even if you kind of winged it. And knowing that if it sucks, it doesn’t really matter because you can always just try it again.

In search of excitement and adventure, The Fool shuns bland food but resists finicky bullshitty recipes like making ravioli from scratch or anything that takes more than 15 minutes, really.

So here’s a smoothie recipe, inspired by The Fool. It has no measurements because The Fool doesn’t waste his time dicking around with teaspoons and measuring cups:

Tropical Green Goddess Smoothie
Drunken by Mayan warlords for thousands of years during worship rituals for the fertility goddess Ixchel (well, if they’d had blenders that is)

1 banana
some frozen pineapple chunks
a bit of coconut milk, coconut water or watersome greens (whatever you have on hand – kale, spinach, chard)
nut butter (peanut, cashew, whatever)- this gives it a rich, decadent flavour, so skip it if you want more of a light smoothie

  1. Put all ingredients in a blender and blend the living crap out of it!
  2. Drink and enjoy ๐Ÿ™‚

Daily Tarot Girl