My evil twin Veronica is back. And she’s been attending Christmas parties, drinking to excess, judging people, shit-talking others and flirting inappropriately. Who better to give you some good, old fashioned Tarot advice?
Universal Waite Tarot Deck (U.S. Games Inc)
The other day I attended a Christmas party where I was subjected to multiple people talking endlessly about themselves.
During one of these “conversations” I smiled and nodded with feigned interest as this lady told me a detailed story about the NYC bus schedule when she lived there three years ago. And then about her last vacation and everything she did every moment of every single day. She went on, and on and on….
I waited patiently for my reward for all this suffering – a chance to finally talk about ME! But sadly, this chance never came.
The “conversations” that followed weren’t much better. I heard all about peoples “6 figure” incomes, real estate investments, vacation plans, babies, grandchildren and allergies.
And this got me thinking….
I seem to possess the superhuman power of awareness that although my life is fascinating to me, it’s not as fascinating to others. Thus, I do not drone on insufferably about the minutiae of my life.
And guess what else?
I ask people questions about themselves. I pretend to give a shit. Sometimes I actually DO give a shit.
But from here on out…NO MORE! I’ve tallied up all the hours spent listening to people wax on about themselves. According to my calculations, I’ve spent over 40,000 hours humoring others. That’s almost 5 years straight of nodding and smiling.
So for the next 5 years (at least) I’m going to attempt to correct this imbalance by talking endlessly about myself every chance I get! Cats I like, hot guys that go to my gym, dirty books I’m reading, teen dramas I’m binging on Netflix – all things I can easily drone on about at my next party! Fuck, I can’t wait!
But I want to know…who are you in this story? The gifted conversationalist or the self-obsessed blabbermouth? (Don’t worry…there’s no judgement here. Ya right!)
Side note: People who boast about making “6 figures” need to fuck off already. And people who ask “are you making 6 figures yet?” need to fuck off twice as hard.
Guess what? My evil twin Veronica is baaaaack! After a several month long “sabbatical” full of cocktails, weed, hot construction workers and hammock naps, she’s raring to get back in the saddle.
A classic one-upper! Six of Pentacles from the Druidcraft Tarot
The holiday season is upon us and it creates a lush environment for The One-Upper to thrive.
Whether it’s excessive gift-giving, over the top home made cookie tins or crafting illusions of extreme busyness, The One-Upper in your life is in their fucking element right now.
And if you usually wring your hands in despair at these expensive gift bearing sharks, listen up.
The best way to deal with The One-Upper is to take full advantage of them.
Enjoy their efforts. Thank them. Be sincere. But do not feel pressured to reciprocate or match the bizarre level of energy and enthusiasm of The One-Upper.
Sure, they’ll think you’re an asshole, but who cares?
You’ll both be getting what you need – they’ll get to reinforce their inner narrative that they’re the good one who tries extra hard and you’re the lazy fuck-up. And you’ll get to practice the zen art of being okay with others thinking you’re a grade A douche bag.
It frees you up!
And next year the bar will be lowered. They won’t have to try so hard to one-up you, serving store bought cookies and doling out $10 giftcards….
And the next year it will be even lower. Perhaps they won’t get you anything.
And WHAM! That’s when you buy them a massive gift basket or surprise them with a box of home made caramels and gold dusted truffles.
Let the instantaneous psychological breakdown commence!
My naughty-affectionate cat head bumped my camera at the very end, causing an abrupt ending. Such a silly kitty! I was going to re-shoot but I was actually finished the reading by the time she rudely interrupted 🙂 So my apologies for the weird, sudden ending.
Cards used: Dame Darcy Mermaid Tarot
Have a great week and as always, I invite you to share your ideas and perspectives on these cards…
I recently “let go” of a friendship that had been slowly fizzling out and was inspired to create this Tarot spread. This spread can be used for any kind of relationship that you’re on the fence about – romantic, friendship or even work related.
*I haven’t numbered the cards because you can read them in any order you like
What Needs to Change? This card will give you ideas on what needs to change in order for you to be happy in this relationship.
(Example: The Hanged Man = I need to stop being so passive and accommodating)
How should you act (moving forward?) This cards gives you insight into what aspects of your personality you need to tap into while you navigate this relationship.
(Example: The Queen of Swords = be a bitch who speaks her mind!)
If you go...
What was the purpose or meaning of this relationship? If you want to fully release this relationship in healthy way, it can help to understand it's purpose in your life and what you learned, instead of writing it off as just another failure.
(Example: 7 of Pentacles = This relationship taught me patience.)
How do you let go?
This card can give you insights into how you can best release this relationship, get over it and move on.
(Example: 3 of Cups = celebrate the good friendships you have)
What action should you take?
This card will (hopefully) help you decide whether to end or continue this relationship.
When I did this spread I got the Princess of Wands from the Heart & Hands Tarot, so I asked what would she do in this situation? and after thinking about it for a bit I decided she would choose the path of least resistance - the one that gave her the most energy.
I hope you enjoy using this spread in all your relationship conundrums!
I am using the Mystical Cats Tarot for this weeks reading (as per the results of my Facebook poll.) If you want to help me choose next weeks reading, head on over to my Facebook page and do the poll!
Have a good week and happy shadow-working 🙂
xoxo
Kate
Not going to a yoga retreat in Costa Rica with my friend Laura (because I thought I was being responsible by saving my money. Stupid!)
…
Spilling fish oil on a shirt and then washing it in the regular wash. DON’T EVER DO THIS!!!! It makes ALL your clothes reek of dead fish for months.
…
Picking up a hitchhiker.
But I suppose if I wanted to be a minimalist, I would say there is actually only ONE thing I regret in life – ignoring my intuition.
Because in all those situations, my intuition was guiding me down the right path but I chose to ignore.
So back to the hitchhiker.
I was vacationing on a small island off the B.C. coast with my significant other and we had just finished a beautiful day hike along a remote beach trail. We were heading back to our cabin along an old, deserted logging road when we spotted a dude hitchhiking…in the middle of nowhere. Weird right?
He looked like an old hippy and at first glance seemed harmless.
A soft voice in the back of my heart said “fuck it, just keep driving” but my mind said “he’s probably a local hippy and hitchhikes all the time. If you don’t pick him up who will? This is the middle of nowhere! Be kind and helpful for once in your life…”
I asked my significant other how he felt about picking him up. He said “it’s your call”. Which is his way of saying if this shit goes south, it’s on you.
I’d never picked up a hitchhiker before. It was something I always considered dangerous but this was different. I was on a small island where everyone knew each other, I had my burly boyfriend with me and this guy just looked like a harmless local. How could this possibly go wrong?
So I pulled over and picked him up. Over the course of our 20 minute drive,I learned four things about him:
His #1 goal was to return to Alberta and get back on his meds.
…
His DNA was part wolf and he was on the island to commune with the wolf packs. Here’s a snippet:“I can run with the wolves because I’m part wolf and they recognize me as one of them. But don’t you try it, okay? Promise me you won’t try it. They would rip you to shreds. I can do it because I’ve got wolf DNA.”
…
He was certain we were being followed by “dark government agents” in a black SUV and that they were trying to run me off the road. Yet there were no other vehicles around (!)
…
He was bleeding from a large dog bite on his arm.
Needless to say, I spent the entire drive tightly gripping the steering wheel and praying he wouldn’t murder us.
(*please note: I do realize that statistically, very few mentally ill people are actually dangerous. And I don’t intend to portray people with mental health issues as “scary” people that should be avoided. This is simply my experience and how it felt to me at the time).
It ended well – we dropped him off at the ferry terminal and he thanked us profusely for the ride and left. But that is the LAST TIME I ever pick up a hitchhiker!
So what did I learn from this? Two things.
My intuition was a soft voice – not a loud one.
I experienced my intuition as a slight feeling of just wanting to keep driving. My intuition didn’t shout NO! DON’T DO IT! Instead it murmured just keep driving.
I think we often expect our intuition to be loud and clear. But intuition communicates through inklings and hunches, not bellowing orders.
My intuition’s worst enemy is my desire to be polite.
Honestly, I have lost count of the times I’ve ignored my intuition for the sake of “being polite”. From my run in with a masturbator at the local pool (a story for another time!) to picking up this mentally unstable hitchhiker, I often favor courting danger over possibly hurting someone’s feelings.
This desire for politeness is a terrible affliction, especially when it overpowers our survival instincts.
Intuitive information is often irrational.
When my friend Laura invited me to go to Costa Rica with her, my intuition said “yes! do it!” but my rational mind said “are you crazy? You need to save your money for a house.”
That time I ran into a pervert at the pool, my intuition told me “this guy is creepy. Leave the steam room now.” But my rational mind said “he hasn’t done anything weird, so relax.” 20 seconds later things got weird.
Your intuition sees past appearances and “facts” to the raw truth of a situation. And while it can sometimes seem like ignoring your intuition is the easiest option in the short term, it never is.
Intuitive Tarot 101
The next time your doing a Tarot reading, be aware that any intuitive information you get may be impolite and irrational!
If you choose to only communicate stuff that makes perfect sense and won’t make your client uncomfortable, you’re tossing a wet blanket on your intuitive flame.
For many years I shied away from communicating what my intuition was telling me during a Tarot reading IF that information might be upsetting or intrusive. This was a mistake!
For example, when I realized one of my clients was planning on breaking up with her dud boyfriend, I avoided saying anything specific about it because she hadn’t asked about her relationship (she’d asked for a “general reading”) and I didn’t want to pry. So of course the reading lacked spice and intrigue 🙁
But I’ve learned from my mistakes. Now I’m more likely to pass on the info my intuition is serving up like I did in this reading, even if it blows back in my face.
Tell me about YOU…
When was the last time you ignored your intuition and regretted it? Tell me in the comments below!
